Alex (@a.praglowskaya) • Collective gay friends app

I’ve realised that the only time I feel insecure is when I try to integrate myself into the society and share my personality with people. Then no one gets me and I start to think that I’m weird. Meanwhile in my own world I fully accepted who I am, every part of my body, my past, my current healing era, I understand why I am the way I am. People get offended that I dismiss their opinions about myself because no one provided what’s that opinion based on, often people project stuff into me and assume my intentions for them. Whenever someone compliments me I think that they telling me the things they like or complimenting the designers of the clothes I’m wearing. I perceive it as common interests. And the only compliments I purely value are about my personality that I also like, or never noticed about myself, but people rarely give me those compliments.

Düsseldorf, Germany

Finally you got your license, less chance to run into you.

Grand Amour by Lin Zhipeng aka No.223

Kinda funny that we all when we think of school in present time we think that it’s still feels like our school in the past, we think that education system hasn’t changed ever since we were kids. Because we may haven’t mentally separated place and time. Similar with migration we think if we leave the country for 10 years it freeze over there. And get shocked that it’s not like that. Or sometimes we think that when we stop talking to someone their lifes freeze till you see them again, or they remain on the same level, their personality hasn’t evolve at all, if you stop talking forever. For some of us it’s hard to imagine that other people have their own lives where they are also the main character.

I need an artistic, skilled (including 3D animations), videographer who is craving ideas with deep messages, a little sprinkle of quirkiness and darkness, but also who is willing to be my soul mate and share same belief in self expression, who can connect with me on the universal level, through stars and galaxies, so I could transfer the closest version of my ideas right into your heart. Someone who is willing to be part of each other’s stories for the rest of our days.

Maturing is stop judging someone for not knowing and having empathy when you realise the reason why.

Who is the real narcissist? The person who doesn’t care about anyone’s opinion on their life, appearance, personality ect, OR the person who gets offended that their opinions get dismissed?

I know that this is one of the good men because he knows that I think he is an idiot, he understands that it’s totally fair and doesn’t get offended.

It crazy to think that there are so many people in the world who never had a thought about history, about ongoing wars, not a single try to philosophical thought, no thoughts of self reflection and no doubt in being “right” therefore never felt guilty. Never imagined how big the universe might be. They never think of where things come from, no curiosity in the people they talking to everyday. One day I asked my coworker what he thinks about all day, he said what he is about to do in the next half an hour. All those people live in the vast variety of types of life: from lower to higher classes, from educated to uneducated, from healthy to unhealthy ect. Those people are not bad, not shallow, not dumb, they are just not interested. Everybody lives to their own truth.

This paranoia of “what’s wrong with me” has gotten so bad that I wonder if anyone ever got a gut feeling with me.

I subconsciously switch into a clown when I’m around people cause my pride and ego doesn’t let me show any sign of weakness and confess to others that I’m actually not doing so fine. Always hated when people pity me. Or even if I open up a little, and they hit with “sorry it happened to you”, I know they were trying to comfort me, but I feel extremely uncomfortable.

Life is a box that you need to fill up with friendships, family, relationships, deep meaningful connections, creativity, passions, happy present moments. Sometimes the box can be conditioned in a certain way and you might need to adjust and adapt to it. Sometimes someone can take a shit in your box and you might start spreading that shit all over other things you have in the box or turn that shit into something else. Either way it’s about how much you gonna fill the box up, not to remember what you had in the box, but just have it all there. Like if time was a physical object – the box.

MATRIARCHY.

I want Melania to leave that mf. People leave their partners for cheating, hers literally starting WWIII.

The biggest emotional support I need right now is walking into my grandma’s room, she’d be laying on the couch and watching tv or talking on the phone to her friends and I just lay next to her and cry for a bit and I’ll be fine.

Also I’m a great dancer! Like those in movies, they never learned, they always felt it. If you know what I mean...

I just watched a movie about how hard men’s life could be, it’s the most boring and embarrassing genre ever. Literally 90% of the movie scenes only with men. Every female character has pieces of misogyny on her. Men represented like they have critical thinking, empathy and power. It categorise what kind of woman is loveable and what not.

When I come into the world fully as I am, then I’ll meet you.

Just singing on the kitchen sink

How am I supposed to have standards and expectations for the person I’ve never met? I want to love a real human, who can sometimes be sad, sometimes annoying, but always loved. No matter what place and time it is. Loved for all the traumas, all the disorders, all the healing, all the uniqueness. Loved by acceptance.

I know that I need to get out from Australia. But I’m scared to go to nowhere. I’m scared of doing it all over again. But I’m also scared of spending the rest of my life in hatred waiting for the “right moment” to make the change.

Just got my period so it makes sense why everyone extra beautiful recently.

Went for a walk through the city today. Saw many beautiful faces. Had an average lesbian experience: I was about to get a coffee, but all over sudden my eye caught this beautiful girl, I liked her style. We made eye contact, checked each other out. She stopped to get a coffee too. She stood right next to me. I died from anxiety and we went seperate ways.

I hate seeing TikToks like “if you have no friends, you’re the problem.” How fucked up do you have to be to throw a statement like that onto the internet — one that’s both broad and deeply personal — without even bothering to clarify what you mean? Friends are people who you share a lot in common with. Even most amoral people can still have plenty of friends. We all have met horrible people who never suffered social consequences of their actions. For example husbands who cheat on their wives never lost friends for that reason cause it’s morally acceptable in their circles. There are countless reasons someone might struggle to make or keep friends: cultural differences, being part of a marginalized group, growing up in a difficult family, struggling with mental health issues, or simply not sharing common interests with the people around them. Loneliness can be harmful, even deadly. Yet people casually throw around these blanket statements online, never considering who might see them. And often, the people sharing these opinions are too shallow to realize they might be doing real damage.

Friendships like Mike Wazowski and James P. Sullivan

Anger is so underrated. Anger comes out when your boundaries are crossed, when someone neglecting you etc. We all have been taught that it’s bad, we should suppress it and be the bigger person. My anger makes me feel loved and protected like no one ever made me feel. Also I’ve read a study a long time ago which mentioned one of the causes of depression is unreleased anger. Which also could be the cause of the opposite. When men express their anger it could be suppressed sadness which was caused by “social norms”.

I hate wearing underwear and clothes in general.

I live in the beachy kinda vibe house and fucking possums run on the deck under my window like elephants.

One of my favourite moments in friendships/relationships is when you get to see their childhood album.

I want to find such a cool person who I can use the word “mathematical” with, as an expression of fascination. But they have to be very smart.

My favourite part about my face is that it’s a little ugly. (I do not have insecurities about my physical appearance)

Alex is on Collective

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