Audiobook thoughts: Shame isnt an emotion, it’s a process. If I can shame myself first, I will avoid vulnerability/the emotion underneath, & risk of rejection. Although, as adults, this often leads to what we fear most: rejection/loss. As kids we had to shame ourselves because it’s too painful to think our caregivers cant meet us, so we make ourselves wrong. As adults, this disconnection from ourselves leads us to disconnection from others. The other side of self-shaming is self compassion, self love, self acceptance. & when we can experience those things, we have more capacity for connection.